Healthy Thinking and Behaving

Adapted Summary of 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey

HABIT 1―Be Proactive

  1. I can choose my response.
  2. I am driven by values and truth, I am not reactive.
  3. I will not let the weaknesses of others control me.
  4. I take initiative and am responsible to make things happen.
  5. I will use proactive language:  “I choose.”  “I control my own feelings.”  “Let’s look at the alternatives.”
  6. I will work on the things I can do something about, which is in my circle of influence.
  7. I will BE more ………..  To change from the inside-out—to be different.
  8. I choose to be thankful.
  9. I will acknowledge mistakes instantly and correct them.
  10. I will make and keep commitments and promises.

HABIT 2―Begin with the End in Mind

  1. I will keep the end of my life clearly in my mind.
  2. I will make sure my life contributes each day in a meaningful way to the vision of my life.
  3. I will use my unique human capacities of self-awareness, imagination, and conscience to examine old scripts and write new ones.
  4. I will determine if my ladder is leaning against the right wall.
  5. I will live out of my imagination instead of my memory.
  6. I will tie myself to my limitless potential instead of my limiting past.
  7. I will develop and use a personal mission statement which is based on correct principles.
  8. I will be principle-centered not spouse-centered, family-centered, money centered, work-centered, possession centered, pleasure-centered, friend centered, enemy centered, church-centered, or self-centered.
  9. As a principle-centered person, I will try to stand apart from the emotion of the situation and from other factors that would act on me, and evaluate the options.
  10. I will imagine myself practicing my personal mission statement.
  11. I will define goals for each of my roles according to the principles in my mission statement to achieve a balance.
  12. I will develop and use a family mission statement to improve my family and our response to crisis.

HABIT 3―Put First Things First

  1. I will organize and execute around priorities.
  2. I will not be problem-minded but opportunity-minded.
  3. I will not react to the urgent but unimportant priorities of other people in Quadrant III or the pleasure of escaping to Quadrant IV.
  4. I will think effectiveness with people and efficiency with things.
  5. I will define my roles and goals for the week, then schedule those goals at the beginning of each week.
  6. I will use stewardship delegation and focus on results instead of methods, or gofer delegation.

Building the Emotional Bank Account

  1. I will make deposits into people’s emotional bank account through courtesy, kindness, honesty, and keeping my commitments.
  2. I will listen and seek to understand.
  3. I will let you feel my concern and acceptance.
  4. I will show understanding and make deposits accordingly.
  5. I will attend to the little things that are important.
  6. I will keep my commitments and promises.
  7. I will clarify expectations about roles and goals.
  8. I will show personal integrity by being honest, keeping promises, being loyal to those present, and avoiding unwholesome speech.
  9. I will apologize sincerely when I make a withdrawal.
  10. I will see my children’s or people’s problems as an opportunity to build relationship instead of a negative, burdensome irritation.

HABIT 4―Think Win/Win

  1. I will constantly seek mutual win/win benefits in all human interactions.
  2. I will build my character through integrity, maturity, and abundance mentality, in which there is plenty out there for everybody.
  3. I will be mature by expressing my feelings and convictions with courage, balanced with consideration for the feelings and convictions of others.
  4. I will develop trust in my relationships with people by building up their emotional bank accounts.
  5. I will write clear agreements that give definition and direction to a win/win situation.  I will define desired results, guidelines, resources, accountability, and consequences.
  6. I will align all the supporting systems for win/win with the goals and values of my mission statement.
  7. I will really seek to understand, then give expression to the needs and concerns of the other party, as well as or better than they can themselves.
  8. I will try to identify the key issues and concerns involved.
  9. I will try to determine what results would constitute a fully acceptable solution. I will try to identify possible new options to achieve those results.

HABIT 5―Seek First To Understand, Then Be Understood

  1. I will listen with the intent to understand and not reply.
  2. I will try not to read my autobiography into other people’s lives.
  3. I will get into the other person’s frame of reference, to see the world the way they see it and understand how they feel and thus give them “psychological air.”
  4. I will not evaluate by either agreeing or disagreeing.
  5. I will not probe with questions from my own frame of reference.
  6. I will not advise or give counsel based on my own experience.
  7. I will not interpret by trying to figure people out, to explain their motives, their behavior, based on my own motives and behavior.
  8. I will rephrase the content and reflect the feeling.

HABIT 6―Synergism

  1. I will value differences—to respect them, build on strengths, and compensate for weaknesses.
  2. To create the ideal environment for synergy; I will build a high emotional bank account, think win/win, and seek first to understand.
  3. I will appreciate the rich resources available through interaction with the hearts and minds of other human beings.

HABIT 7―Sharpen The Saw

  1. I will find physical renewal by eating single ingredient foods (e.g. vegetables, nuts/seeds, beans, fruit, organic protein sources), getting sufficient rest and relaxation, and exercising on a regular basis.
  2. I will find spiritual renewal in daily prayerful meditation.
  3. I will find mental renewal as I read and educate myself.  I will also write in a journal of my thoughts, experiences, insights, and learn to promote mental clarity, exactness, and context.
  4. I will find social/emotional renewal by interacting with integrity toward the people around me and to build their emotional bank accounts.