Self-centered Pride – Hope for Complete Healing

Because this topic is massive, I will break it up into several posts. Today I am introducing the two types of bondages and what freedom looks like. Do you know your hidden bondages? Are you aware of controlling behaviors? Many of us, including me, are not conscious of our unhealthy beliefs and vows that control our actions and reactions. The good news is that God knows all our bondages and wants to set us free. So, what does freedom look like?

The Hidden Internal Bondage in our Lives.

So, what are the hidden bondages that keep us imprisoned? You can find them in your sinful desires and unhealthy beliefs that control your thoughts and emotions. I wrote a short book that I made available on this website that lists possible bondages and unhealthy beliefs about yourself, others, and God. Because we have unique experiences, our hidden bondages will be different, which is why I encourage you to seek the Lord to show them to you. Some bondages are obvious, but you may need a good counselor to identify the less obvious ones. Two common bondages between everyone are self-centered pride and resentment from unforgiven offenses. I am still uncovering resentments from past painful experiences that developed self-centered pride that now control my sinful reactions. I wrote the following example in my last post, but it is a good example, so I want to share it again. God has shown me new unhealthy beliefs He wanted to set me free from.

Example of Becoming Free from Emotional Bondage

This story is an example of how I became free from emotional bondage that controlled my sinful reaction. I became offended by an inconsiderate comment my husband had made, and I said nasty words in return. To cope with the emotional distress, I began cleaning and sweeping the deck, etc. I asked God why his comment triggered my harmful response. God showed me resentment from past hurt when my mother disregarded me. I wanted her praise that she never gave, which caused resentment I did not know existed until it was triggered. I wanted my husband’s praise, so when he criticized me, I got angry. I forgave my mother and my husband, then asked God to take my desire for praise and approval from me. I had the unhealthy belief that if I worked hard, I could win people’s approval. The Bible says that everything we do should be from love and for God’s glory. Love expects nothing in return. I also asked Him to take my self-centered pride. I then repented and asked God for forgiveness for my sinful reaction, and then I asked for my husband’s forgiveness. He did not apologize for his hurtful words, but I forgave him because I wanted to be free from the control of resentment. I asked God to remove the unhealthy belief that I need people’s approval and the prideful desire for praise.

External bondages

Many external bondages develop to cover up internal emotional bondage in our lives. Some of us turn to food, sugar, chocolate, shopping, gaming, TV/movies, music, social media, exercise, etc. when we are emotionally triggered. Sugar is addictive and will cause many problems in your health. Some people turn to alcohol and drugs. I was a workaholic to cope with my mental and emotional bondage. As God heals my emotional bondages, I am becoming free to feel and express love, compassion, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, and so on.

What Does Freedom Look Like?

Freedom is loving ourselves and people from a pure heart. To love yourself may sound prideful, but the fact is, we can’t love others if we can’t love ourselves. We are our worst critics. We beat ourselves up over mistakes we make or things we said that we thought were dumb, etc. The Bible says in Galatians 5:14, “For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’” And James 2:8 states, “If you really fulfill the royal law according to the Scripture, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself,’ you are doing well.” If you are critical of yourself, then you will be critical of others. The goal of my website is to help you love from a pure heart. Purifying your heart requires asking Jesus Christ to uncover your unhealthy beliefs and vows and then transform them using His Word.

About 400 years before the Messiah was born, Isaiah prophesied the following about Jesus Christ. Isaiah 61:1 “The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me, because the LORD has anointed me to bring good news to the poor; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted [those who are deeply afflicted and distressed], to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound.” Jesus read those words in the Jewish synagogue and said in Luke 4:21, “Today this Scripture has been fulfilled in your hearing.” I will delve into this verse and others in the next post.

Conclusion

Because I strive to keep my posts short and quick to read, I will delve deeper into different emotional bondages and how to be free in subsequent posts. If you haven’t read my testimony in “Hope for Complete Healing” click on the title link. Reading my book will help you understand what unhealthy beliefs are, emotional bondages, and the truth that sets you free.

Next, read the rest of the posts on getting free.

Hope for Lasting Peace, Love, and Victory

HOW PRIDE DESTROYS

Do you like to be praised and noticed for the things you do? If we were honest, we like to be appreciated and praised. The root cause is feeling insecure and needing praise to feel accepted and validated. Or, do you know someone who makes sure they let you know how great they are and the good things they do? Do you think they have a self-centered need for people’s approval to feel good about themselves?

Jesus said that a wise person is the one who does what He teaches. In this next lesson, you will learn how to get our approval and reward from our Father in Heaven.

In Matthew 6:1-4, Jesus tells us, “Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven.

²“Thus, when you give to the needy, sound no trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward.

³But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, ⁴so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.”

This passage begins with the word “beware,” which means to be careful or cautious. Why would Jesus begin with the warning to be careful? He knows we struggle with self-centered pride that desires human approval. It is tempting to make sure others notice our good works or right living to feel acceptance from people we admire. Wise people fear God and seek to obey and please Him, not people. Wise people care more about God’s approval than man’s approval.

What are some things we do to practice our righteousness before people? The second verse answers this question. The words “thus, or “so when” are followed by an action. For example, “Thus, when you give to the needy.” It is okay if people see you giving, but when you announce it to receive praise or compare yourself to what others give, that is what Jesus warns us not to do. Jesus said in Matthew 5:16, “In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.”

Why is giving to the needy a work of faith?

James 2:14-18 explains, “What good is it, my brothers, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him? ¹⁵If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, ¹⁶and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and filled,” without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that? ¹⁷So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead. ¹⁸But someone will say, “You have faith and I have works.” Show me your faith apart from your works, and I will show you my faith by my works.” Giving to the poor also shows that you are a follower of Jesus Christ. Mark10:21 states, “And Jesus, looking at him, loved him, and said to him, ‘You lack one thing: go, sell all that you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.’” Again, Jesus is testing the motivation of the man’s heart, which He already knew. Our reward will be the treasure in heaven.

Examine your motive for giving. If public notice is the motivating factor, then it is your only reward. Our motivation for giving to those in need should be out of love. 1John 3:10 tells us, “By this it is evident who are the children of God, and who are the children of the devil: whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is the one who does not love his brother.” Loving others is evidence that we love God. 1John 5:2-3 states, “By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments. ³For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome.”

Conclusion

God’s reward for the good we do is immeasurable. Luke 6:38 states, “Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.” Also consider what King Solomon said in Proverbs 19:17, “Whoever is generous to the poor lends to the LORD, and he will repay him for his deed.” Proverbs 11:24, “One gives freely, yet grows all the richer; another withholds what he should give, and only suffers want.” Proverbs 11:25, “Whoever brings blessing will be enriched, and one who waters will himself be watered.”

I pray God blesses you as you practice righteousness to gain His reward.

Tag: Self-centered Pride

HOW TO BE FREE – Introduction

Wise People Do Not Seek Praise