Self-control and Maturity

What happens when an undisciplined child does not get what they want? Yep, they throw a temper-tantrum. How many adults are still throwing tempter-tantrums? Why? In this post, I will share the why, what, where, and how concerning self-control. Often, people think self-control is self-discipline to eat right and exercise, but it is more than that. I want to go deeper and focus on healing the reason why we lack self-control.

Why can’t I control my emotions?

I asked God why because He knows everything (see Psalm 139:1-3). Several days later as I was writing this post, I realized I was still reacting to disappointment the same way I did when I was a child.  God led me to the following transformational truths. 1Corinthians 13:11 states, “When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became [an adult,] I gave up childish ways.” And, 1 Corinthians 14:20 states, “Brethren, do not be children in your thinking. Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature.” Most of our self-control issues stem from immaturity. Maturity is to be fully developed, perfected, and able to control our thoughts, emotions, and desires. To be mature, we must put away our childish thinking and childish ways.  I will explain how to do this in my next post.

What is self-control?

Synonyms for self-control are temperance, sound mind, and discipline. The Greek meaning for self-control is “power over yourself or strength to govern yourself.” Self-control is our source of power over our will and not will-power. When we have self-control, we have the power to control our thoughts, emotions, and desires.

What is the consequence of not having self-control?

Proverb 25:28 (ESV) “A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.” Modern King James states, “He who has no rule over his own spirit is like a broken-down city without a wall.” The William MacDonald commentary explains Proverbs 25:28 as “A man who has never learned to discipline his life is like an undefended city, open to every kind of attack, exposed to every temptation.”  The Matthew Henry commentary says, someone with self-control rules their thoughts, their desires, their inclinations, their resentments, and keeps them all in good order. If they lack self-control, they are exposed to the temptations of Satan and will have many troubles. The key word is “rules.” To rule is to exercise authority over it. I explain how to do this in Bondage to Unseen Controls and ALL THOUGHTS ARE WITHIN OUR CONTROL

James 1:14,15 state, “But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire. 15) Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death. We must rule our desires and put-up boundaries to protect our vulnerable hearts against temptations and attacks. A boundary that keeps us from sinning could be a truth statement or a command such as “do not get drunk” (Ephesians 5:18). We know that those who give into the temptation to get drunk make themselves vulnerable to many other temptations, troubles, or even death. With this boundary we can choose not to drink alcohol or exercise self-control or temperance and not get drunk. In my Fruit of the Spirit Characteristics worksheets on my website, I define many truths that can be used as boundaries around your heart and mind. With the truth of God’s Word and His divine power, you can govern how you will properly conduct ourselves instead of giving into your desires. For those who lose their tempers, you need to first give up to God your desire to control everyone or everything other than yourself.

Where does self-control come from?

Self-control is produced by the Spirit of God as explained in Galatians 5:23. A fruit grows from branches that are part of a main vine. For Christians to produce fruit, they need to abide in the true vine, Jesus Christ, for life and nourishment (John 15:5).  John 15:1-2 states, I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.” So, if you struggle with self-control, yield to the Father’s pruning in your life.  Childish ways and thinking need to be pruned and removed from your mind.  I explain how to do this in my short-book on my website.

After we have pruned our childish thinking, we then need to rely on Jesus for our strength and righteousness and keep our minds focused on His truths.  When we rely on Jesus, we can draw from His divine power to produce spiritual fruit in our lives. The fruit of the Spirit are the characteristics or virtues of God, which are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control. So, the more we transform our childish thinking with the truth of God’s Word, then we will exhibit more of these virtues of God. And, as we draw divine power from the life of Jesus in us through prayer, we will become partakers of His divine nature, and then we can rule our desires with self-control. The more we gain Jesus’s divine nature, the more spiritual fruit we will have to give to others. We will have more love to give, more patience, kindness, joy, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control.

2Peter 1:3-8 state, “His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire. 5) For this very reason, make every effort to supplement (add to) your faith with virtue (moral excellence), and virtue with knowledge (of Jesus Christ and the truth of God’s Word), and knowledge with self-control (self-rule and self-discipline), and self-control with steadfastness (patience and endurance), and steadfastness with godliness (devotion to God), and godliness with brotherly affection (kindness), and brotherly affection with love. 8) For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.” Faith in God’s promises, moral excellence, knowledge of God’s truths, self-control, patience, devotion to God, kindness, and love, grows within us when we hear the Word of God preached and read our Bibles to transform childish thinking.

How do we put-away childish ways and rule with self-control?

When you were a child, what did your parents do to help you mature and learn self-control? They disciplined you? The Webster dictionary defines discipline as training that develops self-control, character, and proper conduct, which sometimes involves punishment. God also disciplines us when we do not practice self-control and then disobey Him (see Hebrews 12:7,11). Hebrews 12:11 states, “For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” Note to parents, if you don’t correct self-control issues in your child, the lack of self-control will negatively affect every aspect of their adult lives. Disappointment is a fact of life and will happen daily. So, if you teach your children how to accept and process disappointment, then they won’t develop resentment and become emotionally handicap.

So, if there is an area in your life you lack self-control, ask God to show you the childish thinking you need to put away. We then must loose/put off self-centered desires to please ourselves or to control others. I explain this in detail in my short book called “Hope for Complete Healing.”

My next post will delve deeper into why we lack self-control and why we can’t rule our spirits and how to overcome.

There is hope for maturity and to be self-controlled as we transform childish thinking into Godly thinking.

RELATED POSTS:

Four Reasons for Authority in Prayer

Why, What, and How to Submit to God and be FREE

HOW MEMORIES INFLUENCE OUR THINKING, EMOTIONS, AND BEHAVIOR

 

Why, What, and How to Submit to God and be FREE

Submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.” (James 4:7). What does this look like? What does it mean to submit? Webster dictionary says to submit is to yield or surrender to the actions control, power, etc. of another. In this verse the “another” is God. Why don’t we submit to God? Guess what the main reason is? That is right, pride.

My pride kept me from surrendering my anxious and angry thoughts to God for many years because I wanted to be in control of outcomes.  When I became anxious and angry, I also became defensive.  Can you guess what happens when we don’t submit to God? That’s right, we will unwittingly surrender to the devil who will steal our peace, joy, love, patience, kindness, gentleness, trust, and self-control. We will be miserable and unable to love others well. The devil will then lead us into all kinds of fleshly sins to bring destruction to our lives, relationships, and our faith in God. So, who do you want to surrender your life too? A loving God who gives peace and life, or the devil who wants to destroy us (John 10:10). Also, review my post on the four realities of the spirit world.

I already surrendered to God the things that made me angry so they no longer control me.  But, I never considered submitting my anxiety disorder to God until I began self-medicating.  I first had to acknowledge I had a problem, then I asked Him why I was so tense and anxious all the time. The answer came when I read James 4:7 and encouraged an inmate to submit the problem generating her angry thoughts to God and resist the devil. I asked her to think of what happens when we don’t submit our minds to God. That’s when God spoke to my heart and said, are you submitting the problems creating your anxious thoughts to Me.  Whoa! Read the inmate victory testimony here.

I asked God to show me the source of my anxious thoughts. God reminded me that my mother was also diagnosed with anxiety disorder and was always stressed about something. So, I asked God to break the negative stress energy and the predisposition for anxiety from my genetics and remove all DNA markers that trigger stress reactions. I felt peaceful and calm after that prayer. But worldly issues still may trigger anxious thoughts, especially when things are outside your control.

Jesus’s first sermon was called the Beatitudes or Blessings. The Apostle Matthew records a part of his sermon in Chapter 6, where Jesus tells us in verse 25, “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?” Verse 27, “And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?”  The key verses are 33 and 34, which state, “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Therefore, do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” It is clear that being anxious is a sin, and I knew this fact.  But, it is one thing to know something but another thing to repent and surrender to God. The Apostle Paul expresses anxiety at times throughout the new Testament. So, don’t feel guilty but be aware of your thoughts and don’t let them torment you and hold you captive. Remember, you can take every thought captive to obey Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5b).

So, how do we submit to God?

  1. Check your peace and calm level toward various areas of your life (husband, children, job, church, friends, and so on.) As you think about these areas, and you become tense, it is a sign you have negative stress energy from subconscious anxiety and fear.  It is hard to accept the fact you cannot control situations or people. You can only control your actions and reactions. You may have been abused as I have, so you feel the need to control.  I get it.  Give everything outside your control to God, because emotional stress causes physical stress. Stress is very damaging to our health, especially our GI system, if you are unfamiliar with the deteriorating effects of stress, I recommend you research it.
  2. Next, ask God to remove pride. Pride develops when we are wronged in some way. These painful memories need to be healed as well.  If you are easily offended, you have pride. Pride desires to control what people do and how they think. Read these posts for a better understanding: #1 Destroyer of All Relationships and the Solution and The Core Negative Heart Issue and HOW PRIDE DESTROYS
  3. Write all your concerns and what you desire in a prayer format to God, giving Him control and accepting the outcome though you may not understand. Pray for wisdom to know what to do and how to respond. Put your prayers in an appropriately labeled box or journal, and each time you feel anxious, angry, or stressed, remind yourself that God’s got it.  Philippians 4:6,7 states, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7) And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus,”  Do you want this kind of peace in your life?  I do.
  4. The hardest part of submission is giving a thank offering to God during hardship. Being thankful and forgiving is the keys for peace in our lives. Thank Him for the opportunity to grow and to be more like Christ. Thank Him for being your Shepherd and for shepherding those outside your control. Thank Him for helping you to trust Him and to accept His Sovereign will. Continue to give a sacrifice of praise and thanksgiving. The page on my website called Who is God — A-C-T-S prayers will give you plenty to praise Him for and to be thankful.
  5. Go through the five steps to heal your heart and purify your soul.

After you have submitted to God; now resist the devil’s temptation to sin.  To resist the devil describes a struggle, so don’t be hard on yourself, keep struggling but don’t give him an inch. If you continue to sin and feel guilty, that’s not a struggle, that’s giving in.  Galatians 5:1 states, “For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of bondage.”  A yoke is being bound to something like two oxen are yoked together. Jesus said in Matthew 11:29-30, “Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

We struggle to make progress on this road called life and not be defeated.  When we are yoked to Jesus, He is right there to help us when we struggle.  We become yoked to Jesus when we are surrendered to God by focusing our mind on the things of God and ponder His Word.  Furthermore, you have the authority as a follower of Jesus Christ to command the devil to be gone in Jesus’ name, and the devil will flee. Hallelujah.

Put your hope in God when you begin to feel anxious.  The following Scriptures should be memorized and pondered often.  Psalm 16:8 states, “I have set the LORD always before me; because he is at my right hand, I shall not be shaken.”  Also, ponder Isaiah 41:10, which states, “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”  And, Isaiah 26:3 states, “You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.”  For more encouragement see HOPE: How it Motivates and Inspires BUT God’s Sovereignty… and Psalm 91 Posts

There is hope for complete healing, and I am praying for you.  Be blessed.

To understand suffering and God’s sovereignty read 7 Ways to Suffer Well: (Part 1) and Example of Suffering Well and God’s Response: Part 2 of Suffering Well

Other related posts:

Freedom from Anxiety and strongholds of worry and fear

POSTS on Thoughts

Posts on Trusting God

Bondage to Unseen Controls

What are the unseen controls that keep us in bondage?  Do you feel hopeless to overcome the things that seem to control your decisions?   For me, I felt hopeless to control my reaction of anger and anxiety.  I also felt hopeless to control my sugar addiction.  As I work with incarcerated girls at the county jail, they tell me of their hopelessness to control their bondage to drugs and alcohol.   There are many unseen controls influencing us, such as our painful memories from offenses and demonic activity influencing our thought life.

We have a choice to submit our thought life to God or to the devil.  My series of posts on Psalm 91 contain helpful information on how to overcome the bondage and unseen control of the demonic activity around us.  I will be honest; this topic can sound scary.  The reason the unseen demonic world is scary is because we lack understanding.  Our lack of understanding causes us to feel helpless and hopeless to control what happens.  My posts on Psalm 91, explain how to overcome the unseen control of demons and not be afraid:  Psalm 91 posts.

There are two extremes people take concerning Satan and demons. One extreme is to ignore the fact that the unseen demonic world (see Ephesians 6:12) can tempt and influence us.  The other extreme is the Christian who has a fearful preoccupation or fascination with Satan and his unseen kingdom of darkness. The writer, C. S. Lewis, also said there are two wrong extremes, which are to deny the existence of evil spirits or to see them everywhere.  To understand the spirit world better, read the following post: Four Realities of the Spirit World

The Bible, which is the Word of God, is the authority on the unseen demonic world.  Ephesians 6:10-15 tell us how we can stand firm against the schemes of the devil.  Ephesians 2:1 tells us that the devil is the ruler of this world.  It is in our best interest to understand how the demon’s work in our lives. When I share this reality with the precious ladies in my county jail Bible study, they are fill with hope that they can be free from the bondage they are in.

I am now editing a book describing the schemes the unseen demonic world uses to put thoughts in our minds that cause relational damage with God and with others.  I hope to publish it soon. I am researching publishing options.  If anyone has any advice for me, please share.

The second source of unseen control in our lives is from our past experiences.  I have overcome many unseen controls in my life, especially strongholds, and I share my message of hope in the book on my website.  My book explains a successful method to overcome the bondage of the unseen control from our painful memories.  Painful memories are created when we take offense to someone’s perceived or actual wrong actions toward us.  I explain the effects of painful memories in my book and how to heal them.  I give this book to the precious ladies I meet at the county jail, and I have seen marvelous results. To learn more about how offenses destroy us and our relationships and how to overcome them, read #1 Destroyer of All Relationships and the Solution.  I invite you to read my short book of hope starting here: 1–Healing Begins by Transforming Painful Memories.

 

Psalm 91:7-10 — PROTECTED FROM EVIL AND HARM

In verses five and six, we learned that we do not have to fear unseen evil if we stay under the protection of the wings of God’s truth and faithfulness (vs. 4). The next two verses are hard to understand if we do not have the vantage point of dwelling by faith in the secret place of God (verses one and two).

Psalm 91:7-8 states, “A thousand may fall at your side and ten thousand [myriad] at your right hand, but it will not come near you. 8) You will only look with your eyes and see the recompense (reward) of the wicked.

[!] What comes to your mind when you read these two verses?

These two verses are a promise of deliverance and protection from the recompense or repayment of evil. We do not have to fear the calamity God sends on the wicked when we take refuge in Him and trust Him to protect us. Remember, the wicked are those who do evil by harming people instead of loving them. Many who claim to be Christians are wicked because they do not love God by obeying Him and love others as He loves.   See post called: EVIL—What is it and what is the remedy?

I was in many situations where I was being wronged and I had to trust God.  I claimed Isaiah 54:17 which says, no weapon formed against me will prosper!” I also claimed Isaiah 41:10 which states Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed (anxiously look about), for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.” I used the power of my words, and I claimed these verses over my situations, and I had perfect peace.

The following passage explains why focusing on God keep us from being afraid. Psalms 112:7-8 states, He is not afraid of bad news; his heart is firm (steadfast), trusting in the Lord. 8) His heart is steady (secure); he will not be afraid until he looks in triumph on his adversaries.”

The next two verses summarize the first eight verses.  In verse ten, the word “evil” is interpreted as threatening or bringing misfortune and disaster.

Psalm 91:9-10 states, “Because you have made the Lord your dwelling (refuge), the Most High who is my refuge (dwelling place). 10) No evil (harm) will be allowed to befall you, nor will any plague (disaster) come near your tent (dwelling).”

[!] What does it look like to spiritually and mentally dwell with the Lord?

As our earthly dwellings are our physical refuge from wild animals, the cold, heat, rain, and storms, so we spiritually dwell in the shelter of God through our spirits and minds through continual praise and prayer. Continual praise and prayer protect us from the storms of life by taking our focus off the storm and putting it onto God, who is our protector. For example, a Christian family trusted God to protect their home during a terrible hurricane. When the hurricane past, their house was the only one standing, sustaining very little damage.

There were many times I had to trust God for protection. One of those times was during a great wind storm. I became fearful because many huge trees surround my house. I had peace when I prayed verses nine and ten over my property, that no trees would come down and no harm would come to my home. After the storm, my neighbors all had more than one tree come down, but no trees on my property came down. What was more amazing was that four trees fell all in a line, just on the other side of my property line. God answers prayer, so we do not have to be afraid. Note, Psalms 91:10 also includes protection for everyone in your dwelling.

 

 

WORDS HAVE POWER—PART II: Words Produce Death or Life Energy

Death and life are in the power of the tongue” (Proverbs 18:21a). The subject of words having power is not a new idea, but so often we forget that our words have power.  What happens when someone says hurtful things to you?  How do you respond?  How about when someone encourages you?  How does that make you feel?   Words can cripple us or help us soar and accomplish great things.

Consider the following; anytime we speak an unloving, hurtful word to someone, we are wounding the other person and bringing death to that relationship. Would you agree? Also, anytime we speak a negative word about ourselves and our ability; it produces death to our potential. For example, when I believe and say, “I cannot do this;” well then, I won’t be able to do it. If I believe and say, “I’m too stupid,” “I’ll never get this;” well then, I have destroyed my potential ability.

For example, when I told my mother I was going to college, she told me I was too stupid. This comment affected me for several decades. I went to college anyway and graduated.  I struggled, but I more than compensated with my other abilities and God’s help. Thirty years later, I contemplated taking graduate-level classes. I was speaking death into my ability because of the words my mother spoke over me many years earlier. First, I forgave her and asked God to take that word curse off me.  Second, I was encouraged by the truth in 1 Corinthians 2:16b which states, But we have the mind of Christ.”  This encouragement gave me hope, and I immediately said, yes, I can go to graduate school because with Christ’s mind I could do it. I spoke this truth and it changed my thinking, which affected the course of my life. I applied to graduate school and was accepted. And, because I relied on Christ’s ability and not my insecurity, I did very well.

Can our words bring literal death to a person? I believe it could, especially when we speak words like, I wish you were dead, or it would be better if you would be gone. If you are struggling with these types of word curses, please visit my website to learn how to overcome them. Often these people, who hear these words, commit suicide because of the spirit of rejection is so heavy on them.  We need words of encouragement that give hope and empowerment.  The Word of God is full of encouragement and words of hope.  Read through the nine “Issues Worksheets” on my website to fill your mind with empowering truth and hope.  Go to hopeforcompletehealing.com

Furthermore, we all want to be loved and to love.  So, when you speak destructive words of rejection to or about someone, you release the negative energy of that word. For example, one inmate in my bible study said that she was told she would be a failure.  Being adopted, she already felt rejection, then her adopted mother who believed in her died when she was young.  She believed she would be a failure and the feelings of rejection influenced her to make many wrong decisions, which ultimately caused her to end up in jail. Once she became aware of the curses put on her, she forgave the people and put off the curses.  She transformed right in front of me, and I saw a tremendous peace and joy come over her. Once we become aware of curses spoken to us by others, we too can verbally loose and put them off and then bind in the truth of God’s Word.

Remember the saying “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” This saying is a lie.  Hurt people, who have been offended by unloving words and deeds, continue to hurt people. My first husband would speak words of death over me all the time, and I became very depressed and suicidal. My psychologist told me that his opinion was not the truth. My ex-husband was a hurting little boy from an alcoholic family, who had many painful memories. Therefore, his opinion was shaped by the hurt in his heart, which came out of his mouth and created death energy in my soul.

The following verses explain the connection between our thoughts, heart, and words.

Matthew 15:18-19 states, “But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person. 19) For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander.”

Luke 6:45 states, “The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.”

The first step to change an evil heart is to change our negative heart issues generated from painful memories. Ask God to show you why you are having negative issues, which come from being offended when we are not loved as we want to be loved. Being offended opens the door to the temptation to be angry, bitter, depressed, then to slander, gossip, and do hurtful things.  If you hear yourself saying unloving things or unloving things have been said to you, then please visit my website and read how you can discover a new reality for your life. 1–Healing Begins by Transforming Painful Memories

If you haven’t read my first post on the power of our words, I invite you to read it now: WORDS HAVE POWER—Part I: Overcoming The Power of Offensive Words

15 Promises We Can Trust God to Keep

In my last two posts, I shared the many miracles I experienced when I trusted God to keep His promises.  The conclusion I came to is trusting fills us with peace because we don’t have to worry or fret.

So, what prevents us from believing God keeps His promises? The answer to this question is simple; doubt from wrong thinking and lies we believe. Often, the significant people in our lives did not keep the promises they made to us, which causes us to doubt that God keeps His promises. Maybe we did not keep our promises, and the quilt prevents us from believing God keeps His promises. Correcting our corrupted faith from wrong thinking and healing our painful experiences requires diligence and perseverance. So how do we transform our painful experiences and change our wrong thinking? I thoroughly explain how in my book called “Hope for Complete Healing,” which is also on my website. 1–Healing Begins by Transforming Painful Memories.

Read each of the promises listed below and rate, from 0 to 5, how much faith you have in God to keep the promise: 0-not at all, 1-struggling, 2-sometimes, 3-depends on the situation, 4-most of the time, and 5-completely.  Rate all the promises before reading the extra text in italics.



God keeps His promises to His children (John 1:12 ― Romans 9:8). So, it is necessary to rate the first promise as a five.  If you could not answer with a 5, then read each of the scripture passages listed after this promise and pray for God to open your eyes and give you understanding.

1) 0 1 2 3 4 5You are saved from sin and death and have the hope of eternal life (John 10:27, 28; 3:16 – Romans 5:12; 6:23; 8:2; 10:9 – Ephesians 2:8 – Titus 3:4-7 – 1 John 5:13). To become a child of God, you must believe in the name of Jesus, and then ask Him to come into your heart by faith (Ephesians 3:17) and to fill you with His life, light, and love. Jesus is the only legal way to get into heaven (John 14:6).

2) 0 1 2 3 4 5God forgives all your sins and cleanses you from all unrighteousness when you confess your sin (Psalms 103:3 and 1John 1:9).

If you did not answer 5, then ask God to show you if you haven’t forgiven yourself, and if so, what do you need to forgive yourself for. Follow the steps listed after the survey to resolve why. If He shows you need to forgive someone, then do that, because Matthew 6:15 states “but if you do not forgive others their sins, neither will your heavenly Father forgive your sins.” Ask God to remove the guilt from your heart, and then with thanksgiving, bind in the promise above.

For example, I asked God to show me why I did not feel love. God showed me that I did not love myself, and therefore, could not love others, so I asked God to reveal why. He revealed the answer during a Bible Study. The leader explained how the Old Testament Priests offered two sacrifices, one for the forgiveness of sins and another for guilt. God showed me I needed to ask Him to remove the guilt from my past sins. After I prayed, I felt a huge weight lift off me. Not only does He forgive all our sins but forgets them as well (Jeremiah 31:4 and Hebrews 8:12).

3) 0 1 2 3 4 5God will never leave you nor forsake you because He loves you (Deuteronomy 31:6&8 and Hebrews 13:5).

If you did not answer 5, then ask God to show you the painful memories of being abandoned, rejected, or neglected. Follow the steps listed after the survey . Maybe you feel God has abandoned you by not answering a prayer, which caused an offense to form in your heart. Often, unconfessed sin prevents answers to prayer (see Psalm 66:18 and Isaiah 59:1,2). Follow the steps after the survey and work through the offenses (resentments, even toward God), then bind in the promise with thankfulness. Psalm 9:9-10 states, “The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know Your name trust in You, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek You.” Also, look-up Psalm 107:13-16.

God did not answer my prayer to heal my first marriage and keep us together. I felt forsaken and despaired as I faced divorce.  I was pouring my heart out to God and told Him I was going to walk away from my faith. And God answered, “What is the alternative?” I thought about it and knew that Satan would love to destroy me, so I stayed tight with God and experienced many miracles, which I wrote in the post Trust God to Keep His Promises

4) 0 1 2 3 4 5You are more than a conqueror through Christ who loves you, and nothing will separate you from His love (Romans 8:37-39). Also see Ephesians 3:16-19.

If you did not answer 5, then ask God to show you the painful experiences of failure or memories of not being loved and accepted. Isaiah 54:10 states, “’Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,’ says the Lord, who has compassion on you.” Breathe deeply and repeat this truth over and over until it enters your heart. Follow the steps after the survey to resolve the reason why you doubt.

5) 0 1 2 3 4 5God’s plans for you are for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope (Jeremiah 29:11).

If you did not answer 5, then ask God to show the wrong choices you made and the fear of consequences that has stolen your hope. Or, you may have painful memories concerning mistakes others have made that have affected you and your hope for a good future. Maybe you’re struggling with trials and hardships, and you can’t see how good can come out of them. Follow the steps after the survey to resolve these painful issues. Meditate on Psalms 34:4, “I sought the LORD, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears.” Also meditate on Isaiah 26:3.

6) 0 1 2 3 4 5God will cause all things to work together for good according to His purpose for those that love Him (Romans 8:38 – Proverbs 3:5-8).

This promise is often overused, but it still comforts us when we don’t understand why something happened as it did, and God did not answer our prayer the way we wanted. For example, I did not like losing my job, but God wanted me to write another book, and that was the only way it was going to happen. When I completed the task, then I was offered another job. During that time, God provided for all my needs. Also, God wants to heal all the memories of disappointment from your past and show you His goodness. If you did not answer 5, then follow the steps after the survey to resolve the reason for your doubts.

7) 0 1 2 3 4 5God will supply all your needs according to His riches (Philippians 4:19 and Matthew 6:31-33).

God will not always give you what you want (James 4:3), but what you need. Practice thankfulness for the things He has given you. For example, I needed a free small piano for my son, so I prayed for it. The next day I turned on the radio, which I rarely do, and a woman was giving away a piano. It was the exact size I needed, and even though it was broken, it played beautifully. Psalms 37:4,5 states, “Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. 5) Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act.” Notice what our response is to be in this verse. If you did not answer 5, then follow the steps after the survey to resolve the reason why.

8) 0 1 2 3 4 5When we come to God and do what He says, we will dwell secure and will find rest, without the dread of disaster (Psalms 91 – Proverbs 1:33 – Matthew 11:28-29).

If you feel anxious or dread that something terrible will happen, then ask God to heal those memories of painful things happening to you, (i.e., abuse). It may be helpful to read my post ANXIETY: Protected by Worry and Fear Strongholds and Why, What, and How to Submit to God and be FREE  If you did not answer 5, then follow the steps after the survey to resolve the reason why you have doubts.

9) 0 1 2 3 4 5God is faithful. He will establish you and guard you against the evil one (2 Thessalonians 3:3 – 2 Timothy 4:18 – 1 John 5:18 – Psalm 121:7-8).

Sometimes we need to claim promises by faith even when we don’t understand how God will keep the promise. Remember the miracles God did for King Jehoshaphat in 2 Chronicles 20. Also remember, giving God thanks for keeping His promises is a way to exercise our faith. If you did not answer 5, then follow the steps after the survey to resolve your doubts.

10) 0 1 2 3 4 5God is faithful, and He will not let you be tempted beyond your ability to bear it.  With the temptation, He will provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. (1 Corinthians 10:13).

Know that we all will be tempted, which will be different for each person because Satan knows our weaknesses. When God shows you the way of escape, then obey. If you have to get rid of Facebook or the internet, do it. If you have to give up your friends who want to take you in a direction you don’t want to go, then walk away from them, they aren’t really your friends. Make new friends who are healthy and walking in the newness of Christ (Ephesians 4:17-24). Be in the Word of God every day and pray continually (see I Peter 5:8-10 and Ephesians 6:10-18). Resist the devil and draw near to God (James 4:7,8). If you did not answer 5, then follow the steps after the survey to resolve the reason for the doubt.

11) 0 1 2 3 4 5God gives power and strength and helps us when we trust Him (Isaiah 40:29-31 – Isaiah 41:10 – Psalms 46:1 – Hebrews 4:14-16).

Claim this promise for all your addictions or trials you may be facing. If you are trying to overcome an addiction, then read how to overcome addictions in my book first. If you did not answer 5, then follow the steps after the survey to resolve the reason why.

12) 0 1 2 3 4 5God is doing a new thing in your life, and He will make a way where there is no way (Isaiah 43:19).

This promise was one I claimed when I was struggling as a single mother, and He answered this promise in marvelous ways. Rejoice when you see God doing new things in your life and when you see opportunities you never dreamed you would experience. If you did not answer 5, then follow the steps after the survey to resolve the reason why.

13) 0 1 2 3 4 5God’s peace will guard your heart and your mind when you trust Him in every situation and pray with thanksgiving as you present your requests to Him (Philippians 4:6-7). Also see Luke 11:9-13 and Isaiah 26:3.

14) 0 1 2 3 4 5If we ask anything according to His will, He hears us and if we know He hears us in whatever we ask, we know we have the requests we have asked of Him (1 John 5:14-15 – 1 John 3:21-23 – John 15:16).

15) 0 1 2 3 4 5If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you (James 1:5 – Proverbs 2:6; 3:13; 4:7; 8:12; 9:10; 11:2; 13:10; 15:33 – Ecclesiastes 2:26 – Ephesians 1:17).


Evaluate the promises you answered 0 to 4, by praying through the following steps to heal the painful experiences and memories that may be causing you to doubt.

1. Ask God to show you why you do not completely believe the promise. It could be a painful experience that generated an offense (also called resentment), which is causing you to believe a lie. Be patient and sensitive to images or feelings He brings up from your subconscious mind.

a) It may be guilt from a sin you committed or a promise you did not keep, which can be confessed to God and ask His forgiveness.
b) It may be a sin from another person who hurt you. The hurt is healed when you forgive that person, and then ask God to heal the wound and remove the negative energy from the painful memory. If you find it hard to forgive, then read my post: “Why should I forgive?

2. Write down the reason you doubt, or the revealed memory of the offense, word curse, etc. And then ask God to lose the negative effects of the memory and offense from your heart and mind. Find something to be thankful for.  For example, thank Him for what He did to protect you, provide for you, prevent worse things, or comforted you.

3. Next, list all unhealthy beliefs (lies you believe) that the Holy Spirit reveals that is causing you to doubt. Ask God to lose and remove these lies, and then bind in to your heart the truth found in the Bible passages listed after the promise.

4. Last, identify the wrong behaviors (sins) and decisions you made as a result of wrong thinking and doubt. Repent by confessing them and seeking God’s forgiveness. See 1 John 1:9. If this does not make sense, then my book mentioned above will help explain this concept more clearly.

The Bible contains many more promises that we can believe and claim for our lives and for the difficult situations we are going through. I recommend the book called “Scripture Keys for Kingdom Living” compiled by June Newman Davis, for many more promises to believe.

Trust God to Keep His Promises

This post recounts the miracles I experienced when I trusted God to keep His promises.  In my last post, I explained my experience of feeling peace knowing I can trust God to keep His promises.  God keeps His promises even if we don’t physically see it, which is why we need faith. Hebrews 11:6 states, “And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.”  Doubt keeps us from experiencing miracles.  We cannot have faith and doubt, that is a double mind. James 1:6-8 states, “But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.” My encouragement is to expect God to keep His promises through faith. Remember what Hebrews 11:1 explains what faith is? “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”  For example, we don’t see the flower bulbs in the ground, but we have the promise that when spring comes the bulbs will miraculously produce beautiful blooms.  The promises of God are assurances, and we can expect for God to keep His promises, just as we can expect flower bulbs to bloom.

One of my favorite Old Testament stories of faith is when King Jehoshaphat faced enemy armies, and he became frightened. See 2 Chronicles 20 for the whole story. So, he prayed and reminded God of his promises to the people of Judah and recounted all that God had done. Then God spoke through a prophet, and he said, “Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed at this great horde, for the battle is not yours but God’s.” Then He said to go out against them, and He will be with them.  They worshiped God and obeyed. So, Jehoshaphat sent the singers first, and they sang, “Give thanks to the LORD, for His steadfast love endures forever.” Then what happened next was amazing. God caused the armies to destroy each other during the night. When they arrived at the battle field and saw what happened, they worshiped the Lord.

The application to our lives is that situations will happen that frighten us. When this occurs, pray by faith; recount God’s promises, remember what He had done in the past for you, and seek His help. When He tells you what to do, then obey and worship Him. When you see the victory, give God the thanks and praise.

For example, when I became a single mother of two toddlers with no job, I was frightened. When the father of my children said, if I leave him, I will never see the children, I was frightened. When I did not know where I would live, I was frightened. So, I prayed and told God that He promised to supply all my needs according to His riches (Philippians 4:19), and I reminded myself that He owns the cattle on a thousand hills (Psalms 50:10) and can provide for all my needs. Also, I was very afraid my ex-husband would kill me and the children, so I trusted in God’s promise to protect me and my children as He protected David when King Saul tried to kill him.  Luke 18:27 states, “But He said. ‘What is impossible with man is possible with God.’  Think about your situation.  What promises of God do you need?  In my next post, I will list key promises we can trust God to keep and the corrupt thinking that keeps us from having the faith to believe.  God kept the promises that I claimed over my situations.

The first major miracle; a friend suggested I become a seamstress and run an alteration business. Though I did not know what to expect, I advertised and went to dry cleaners looking for work. Praise God, I earned enough money to pay my bills and put food on the table and keep my children at home with me.  Not having to send my children to daycare was an answer to one of my many prayers.

The second major miracle was providing a place for us to live. I didn’t qualify for a mortgage and rent was high. But, a banker in my church called me up and said he found someone who would give me a mortgage, which is a modern-day miracle.  I can testify to many other miracles of how God provided for me and my children.

The third major miracle was how God protected my children and prevented my ex-husband from making sure I never saw them again. I must admit that I had anxiety attacks every time he came to pick up the children.  One time he kidnapped the children and refused to let me see them. I paced and prayed for 11 days until my lawyer was able to get them returned. I have feet problems to this day from that event. God was with me and helped me through all the court hearings. During one court hearing my ex-husband had a psychologist come in to testify that I was an abusive mother and I should not have any custody. The psychologist testified on my behalf and my first husband’s lawyer even advocated for me; what an incredible miracle.

His next attempt to get full custody was to get married.  He took me to court and told the Judge it would be better for the children to be in a two-parent home.  The Judge did not go for. God is good. Though I went through many trials, I learned I could trust God to keep His promises.  To clarify, I was not a perfect Christian. I had a lot of anger and anxiety, which manifested often, from all the abuse I went through. I continually confessed my sin and sought God’s help.   I trusted in another promise found in Hebrews 4:16 which states, “Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”  Paul also sought God’s help during a trial he was suffering and God said, “My  grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”  2 Corinthians 12:9.  God’s grace is His power.

The fourth major miracle was sending me a wonderful second husband.  I was not looking to remarry or date because I had a 90% chance of marrying another abusive man.  When my separation happened with my first husband, I claimed the promise in Isaiah 61:7,8 which states, “Instead of their shame my people will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace they will rejoice in their inheritance; and so they will inherit a double portion in their land, and everlasting joy will be theirs.  8) For I, the Lord, love justice; I hate robbery and iniquity.”  I received a double portion for sure.

I describe my transformation from anger and anxiety to peace and joy in the following blog called: WHAT IS INNER LIFE TRANSFORMATION?