Hope for Lasting Peace, Love, and Victory

Many of the women I minister to feel there is no hope for overcoming their situations. And sadly, I often meet women who are put in jail right after having a baby that tested hot for drugs. Equally sad are the women whose children have been taken away from them, which drives them to use drugs and alcohol to escape that emotional pain. These women feel defeated and hopeless. When I asked them why they use, 99% of them say it is to avoid feeling emotional pain. They know the drugs and alcohol takes them further away from the life they desire. But, they feel they have no inner strength to stop using drugs or drinking alcohol. Their hearts are full of emotional pain from unloving acts from those who should have loved them. Unfortunately, most people do not realize they have a love hunger that they are trying to satisfy with everything but the true source of love.

You may not have a drug or alcohol problem, but if you are honest, you also have some mechanism for escaping inner pain (e.g., binge eating, shopping, watching TV/movies, workaholism, etc.) For example, I was a workaholic, and my accomplishments helped me feel good, which concealed the pain in my heart. I also felt helpless to control my anger when I was offended. As a result, I believed I was unlovable and worthless for close to 50 years. I have good news; with God’s help, I was able to transform my unhealthy beliefs and wrong thoughts with His truth.

The following five facts have helped the women in jail have hope to achieve lasting peace, love, and victory.  I pray they help you as well:

1. Know the source of offenses that steal your peace, love, and sense of worth.

a) Taking an offense to something is when you feel resentment for something done or said which often causes hurt feelings or displeasure. These resentments build up in our hearts throughout our lives.

b) The demonic powers around us are destructive forces in our lives. In Ephesians 6:12 it says, “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” Also see Eph. 2:2; 2Cor. 4:4.

c) The Bible says that the devil is the father of lies (John 8:44). The lies we believe cause us to be offended, which results in resentment and hate. For example, my oldest son believed the lie that I hated him because I disciplined him. He believed the lie that my discipline was abusive, therefore, he says he hates me. I can’t change what he believes because resentment is consuming and the demons keep it stirred up in him to keep him in bondage to these destructive thoughts.

d) The demons want to keep you defeated by destroying your peace, self-worth, and ability to feel loved. Children are their favorite target because they are so vulnerable, then as adults we wonder why we have so many offenses in our hearts. Feeling unloved and offended can lead to various destructive actions and addictions, which result in feeling more defeated. For instance, when I am offended and get upset, I desire to binge eat, especially chocolate, or I get angry and tell the person off. Both responses are destructive; binge eating is destructive to my body and anger destroys my relationships. We can choose to respond with peace and love, which I know sounds impossible. Choosing a non-destructive action requires us to constantly check our thoughts and control them, though I still need to improve. Awareness of how we are offended is the first step.

2. Know your source of help to resist the demonic attempts to destroy you.

a) Jesus knows what it is like to suffer demonic attacks and temptations. He overcame the devil and defeated the enemy of our souls, and is able to help us overcome (see Hebrews 2:17&18; Heb. 4:15&16; and 1 John 3:8).

b) To receive this help, we need to put off the pride of being self-focused and the lie that we don’t need Jesus.  Then, humbly ask Him by faith to transform our lives. When we do this, then we will be rooted and grounded in His love and nothing can separate us from His love (see Ephesians 3:17; 1 John 4:9-10; and Romans 8:35-39). Also, we will be filled with the Holy Spirit who is our helper (see John 14:26; 15:26; and Romans 8:24-27).

c) After receiving Jesus into our hearts and submitting to God, which is to obey Him, then we will have all the divine promises in Christ Jesus. We will also have his divine nature and power to have lasting victory over all our issues and addictions. 2 Peter 1:3-4 says, “seeing that His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence. 4) For by these He has granted to us His precious and magnificent promises, so that by them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world by lust.” We tap into this divine power by faith through prayer and believing. We do not see the divine power in us, but we know it is there by faith and that it is ours through prayer.

3. Know the true source of love, peace, and victory.

a) God will always love us and He gives us His worth. (See Colossians 3:12). He is our only source of love; not our parents, not our boy/girlfriends, not our family, not our spouse; no one can love us as God does. Our love is flawed because each of us has wounds and hurts (offenses) from the sins and weaknesses of those around us.

b) God is our only source of peace. Isaiah 26:3 says “You keep him/her in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You, because he/she trusts in You.” Jesus said in John 16:33, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (Also see 1 John 5:4) The key to lasting peace is to keep our minds on God through continual prayer.

c) God is our only source of victory over the demonic world; James 4:7,8 says, “Submit yourselves, therefore, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 8) Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.” Victory occurs when we submit to God and resist the devil through prayer and standing firm in our faith.  Victory also requires that we remove sin from our lives. Also see 1 Peter 5:8,9a.

4. Know the truth and pray the truth to stay in perfect peace, love, and victory.

a) Our responsibility is to keep our minds on the truths of the Word of God and remain with Him through prayer. As we stay in prayer, we will be victorious over the many temptations to believe the devil’s lies and become offended (John 15 and Colossians 3:1-3). But first, we need to humbly confess our sins through prayer and seek God for forgiveness (see 1 John 1:9). You see, sin blocks our prayers and God will not hear our prayers because He is Holy (see Is. 59:1,2).

b) If we keep our minds on our problems and what we don’t like, then we will be worried, fearful, angry, depressed, etc. So, when you find yourself focused on a problem or an offense, then turn it into a prayer of repentance and submission to regain your peace, love, and victory. For example, we can get upset with a family member for the things they did or said or how they said it, and it can consume us. But when we turn the problem over to God and trust Him with it, then we will be filled with peace and love again. I have also found that being thankful keeps me in peace. As you know, when you don’t feel peace in yourself, you are not at peace with others around you.

c) Our prayers and words have power and we can take every thought captive in the name of Jesus and command them to be gone. 2 Corinthians 10:3-5 says, “For though we walk in the flesh (live in the world, NIV), we do not war according to the flesh, for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh (this world), but divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses (strongholds). We are destroying speculations (arguments) and every lofty thing (pretensions) raised up against the knowledge of God (truth), and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.” Taking our thoughts captive is critical to have lasting victory over our destructive emotions and actions.

5. Lastly, remove the many offenses in our hearts through prayer and forgiving.

a) Offenses hinder love but purifying out hearts by removing offenses allows us to feel love and to love others. Purifying our hearts begins with obeying the Word of God, that is, to do what it says. 1 Peter 1:22 states, “Having purified your souls (heart, mind, and conscience) by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart.” We are able to love with a pure heart when our soul wounds are healed as outlined in my healing booklet found in my website (hopeforcompletehealing.com).

b) One of the truths we need to obey to be victorious over offenses is to forgive those who offended us. Then to put off the lies we believed. (See Matthew 6:12; Colossians 3:13; Ephesians 4:32). Our unforgiveness perpetuates the inner pain we feel and keeps us in bondage to it. We will never have lasting peace, love, or victory if we do not forgive.

I hope you found these five facts helpful and know that lasting peace, love, and victory is possible. In my website, I list many truths concerning key character traits to help you replace the devil’s lies with truth. I encourage you to take a look at these and be blessed.

 

Escapism; protected by Strongholds of Loneliness and Discontentment

When we don’t feel loved, we feel lonely.  Every living person has felt lonely at one time in their lives. Some of us feel lonely all the time. It is my experience and observation that loneliness comes from a love deficit, both in receiving love and giving love, but more than that, it is a lack of felt love.  The loss of felt love often happens when there is a death or divorce.  It also happens when a person is in or from a dysfunctional or abusive home that lacked felt love.  Moreover, we were created by God to be loved and to love, and when love is missing, we feel empty and alone, like an empty building, and we want to escape.

Loneliness is often accompanied by depression, which is a feeling of sadness and dejection.  Many married couples feel lonely because they do not know how to love well.  More often than not, one or both partners have not experienced a healthy love, which carries over into their marriage, and is passed down to their children. We marry looking to feel loved but when one or both have no love to give, therein lies the beginning of a dysfunctional relationship and a dysfunctional family.  The unmet desire to be unconditionally loved makes us want to isolate ourselves and to suppress our desire. We often isolate ourselves by escaping into drugs, alcohol, work, shopping, entertainment, sports, etc.

If you have not experienced healthy love, you may have a stronghold of loneliness that keeps you in bondage to unhappiness and depression. The stronghold of loneliness also protects the stronghold of discontentment.   If you are unfamiliar with double strongholds, please read the following post first: STRONGHOLDS PART I—What are they and how do they affect us?

Discontentment, according to Webster, is to lack contentment; to be dissatisfied; to have a restless desire for something more or different. To be content is to be satisfied with what one has and is not disturbed by a desire for something more or different.  Discontentment also happens when we have unrealistic expectations. The stronghold of discontentment protects the authority seat of escapism; that is, the desire to escape from our loneliness and discontentment through many different means. Some of the means of escape are: drinking alcohol, using drugs, watching TV, spending hours on social media, working long hours, playing video games, uncontrollable daydreaming, buying things, etc.

The following are the unhealthy beliefs this stronghold combination protects. The loneliness stronghold protects the following unhealthy beliefs: First, “I am alone because I am unlovable.” Second, “I need to isolate myself because I don’t trust that I won’t get hurt or I will be let down.” Third, “I am alone because I am different and unaccepted.” Some of the unhealthy beliefs, protected by the discontentment stronghold are: First, “ I need more because what I have is not enough.” Second, “I need to have something different (i.e., life, car, house, furniture, spouse, job, etc., [different for each of us]).” Discontentment has many facets, but the remedy is thankfulness and trusting God to provide the things we need (and sometimes want).

Next, evaluate what is on the escapism seat of authority (the throne) that controls your choices. I found that I needed to be busy all the time to not feel my loneliness or discontentment. I also found that I would daydream to escape the discontentment and boredom of life. Most times my thoughts were unproductive, futile, unprofitable, and empty musing. The escape mechanisms you choose may be different than mine.  Also, our escape mechanism often becomes an addiction that controls our thoughts. Please visit my website to learn how I overcame this stronghold combination and addictions with the help of God, and how you can as well. https://hopeforcompletehealing.com/

STRONGHOLDS PART I—What are they and how do they affect us?

I knew I had a stronghold issue by the negative behavior patterns that would control my reactions to situations.  Mental strongholds are unknown to our conscious mind until we seek God to reveal them.  In addition, mental strongholds often come in pairs to ensure we remain in bondage to our unhealthy beliefs and wrong thinking.  Also, I learned that mental strongholds protect seats of authority, much like castle walls protect a ruler’s throne.  The authority seat holds beliefs that rule our lives by controlling what we think, and thoughts dictate what we say, and do.  Now imagine having many double-walled castles in your heart, and each one protects a seat of authority that rules your thoughts.   Go to my website to learn more about each of the following stronghold combinations and how to destroy them.

–Authority seat of anxiety is protected by the strongholds of worry and fear.
–Authority seat of insecurity is protected by the strongholds of control and betrayal.
–Authority seat of disappointment is protected by the strongholds of apathy and rejection.
–Authority seat of insignificance is protected by the strongholds of rejection and misplaced approval.
–Authority seat of humiliation is protected by the strongholds of shame and sadness.
–Authority seat of impatience is protected by the strongholds of injustice and unfairness.
–Authority seat of anger is protected by the strongholds of pride and judgment.
–Authority seat of doubt is protected by the strongholds of rebellion and independence.
–Authority seat of deception (lying) is protected by the strongholds of protection and manipulation.
–Authority seat of oppression is protected by the strongholds of irresponsibility and infirmity.
–Authority seat of escapism is protected by the strongholds of loneliness and discontentment.
–Authority seat of desire is protected by the strongholds of pleasure and addictions.

Tearing down strongholds, especially addiction strongholds, requires that we can hear from God.  To hear from God, we need to be in a right relationship with God. Please visit my website to learn more about how you can be right with God and to be free from the bondage of the above stronghold combinations.

UNHEALTHY BELIEFS PART 1: What are they and where do they come from?

A wrong or unhealthy belief is basically a lie about the true nature of reality about ourselves, life, and God. For example, if you believe that you are not worthy of love, you believe a lie. These lies come from words spoken over us and from memories of offenses done against us. For example, I grew up in a very dysfunctional angry “Christian” home and I developed a lot of unhealthy beliefs about myself, other people, life, and God. I share my story in more detail on my website called hopeforcompletehealing.com, so if you want to learn more about unhealthy beliefs, please visit.

The following are nine categories of unhealthy, destructive beliefs that will distort the way you view everything in life. The primary unhealthy beliefs are:

1. I am unlovable. I am insignificant. I am flawed.

2. I am hopeless. I am worthless. Life is hopeless.

3. Something bad will happen. The future will be like the past. I’m not OK.

4. Something must change right now for me to be OK.

5. People will take advantage of me. People are too sensitive.

6. I am bad. I am not good enough. I am unforgivable.

7. People are out to get me. I must be in control. It’s not fair.

8. People must think well of me for me to be OK.

9. I can’t do it. I am not capable. Others should do it for me. It’s not fair.

The Healing Codes Manual by Loyd and Johnson, p. 55

These unhealthy beliefs, which are internalized and on an unconscious level, cause us to live in self-destructive ways, which often lead to addictions. They also create stress in our bodies that lead to illness and disease. To uncover your unhealthy beliefs; first, pay attention to your thoughts and reactions. Secondly, ask God to show you the unhealthy belief(s) that is generating your wrong thinking and/or behaving and the trauma memories and offenses that created the wrong belief(s). Thirdly, trace backward from negative fruit in your life, and prayerfully ask God, “what is the root of this fruit?” He will show you so you can then remove it through prayer and repentance. I have many examples of how to do this on my website hopeforcompletehealing.com.

Reading self-help books also reveal unhealthy beliefs and wrong thinking. Unhealthy beliefs may also come from word curses spoken by yourself or others. Some examples are: “I will probably fail. I will most likely end up in divorce. Nobody likes me. All politicians are evil. A godly person can’t succeed in business.” Have you thought these?

I learned how to pray by faith and be set free from unhealthy beliefs and mental strongholds that protect the unhealthy beliefs. I then learned to replace the lies I believed with the truth. This helped me eliminate many mental strongholds, negative thoughts, and unhealthy beliefs that controlled my behavior. But I didn’t see lasting transformation until I read The Healing Codes book and manual (HCM), by Dr. Alexander Loyd, Ph.D., ND with Dr. Ben Johnson, MD, DO, NMD, in which they explained the importance of healing bad memories and offenses that cause unhealthy beliefs and physiological stress. See my website pages to understand how to be free from these unhealthy and wrong beliefs/lies/expectations and the strongholds that protect them.

The above statements are passages from my book called “Unseen Battles for Your Mind,” which is in the editing stage, and therefore, is not to be recopied without my permission.

Addiction Strongholds

ADDICTION, there is hope of freedom and I have found the key to breaking those strongholds. What really is an addiction? Most people think an addiction has to do with drugs and alcohol and it does. But really? Is that all? Webster’s dictionary says that an addiction is a habit or practice, especially a bad habit. For example, are you in the habit of watching TV every night, playing video games for hours, eating ice cream before going to bed, spending hours on social media, etc. These things are not necessarily bad habits in and of themselves, but these things are bad in a sense that they rob the person of the freedom to not do it. The bad habit or practice may rob the person of quality family time, being productive, good health, strong relationships, etc. For some of us, like myself, I craved approval and if I did not get it I became depressed and angry. Some of us are addicted to worry, in which we can’t help ourselves, we just can’t stop worrying. How about shopping, eating too much, sugar, anger, pornography, sex, tobacco use, etc.? Do you see where you may have an addiction? Is there something you can’t possibly give up or you cannot control doing? Often a person has more than one addition.

For example, I had a serious addiction to anger. I could not control it; it controlled me. I was angry about everything.  Moreover, I was very embarrassed by it and it was destroying my family; I had to find the solution, and I did. Christian people would say that anger and rage are a sin and to repent and I would agree but when an issue has control of you then you have a mental stronghold that protects wrong beliefs.  Consequently, the wrong beliefs control what we think, feel, and how we behave and react. I discovered the key to destroying these mental strongholds and changing the wrong beliefs they protect.

I have broken all my addictions (i.e. compulsive bad habits, practices, and desires) which I describe on my website where I write about why we have addictions and how to break them. I do want to note that I begin my research with my own experience and how I recovered from many issues that controlled my behavior, namely the trauma memories of abuse that lead me to have various addictions. I have shared the information on my website with many women that come to my county jail Bible study, who have various addictions, and I have seen incredible transformations in their lives. One of the women had an addiction to lying, which caused her to extort money from people, which then landed her in the state pen. I watched her work through her issues that led to her addiction to lying through using the information on my website, it really does work. These women leave with the hope of being free from their addictions and living a healthy life for the sake of their children and grandchildren. I hope you visit my website.

Furthermore, all addictions have a compulsion element, a pleasure element, and a regret element. The element that indicates a person has an addiction is regret. You might say, “I wish I would not do that.” Or, “I want to stop but I can’t help myself.” What are your regretful comments? There is hope.